Snack time

[Sitting at my desk correcting a few final worksheets for them]

Small spastic child: Teacha! Teacha! Miss Patreesia!
Me: [turn to child] Yes, what do you nee...
Small spastic child: Eat! [Shoves a Cocoa Puff into my mouth while I'm still talking] Eat! Eat!

I don't even like Cocoa Puffs.

You might think that's cute but all I can say is it's a good thing that tomorrow is the last day of school.

A is for Azerbaijan...

Can you name the countries that go with these flags?
How many adults do you know who can draw this many flags from memory?
Most brilliant kindergartener of all time? Possibly.

Trials, tribulations, and tokens

Everyone, breathe! Concerts are over- with minimal tears, waawaas (booboos), and failures. Almost everyone sang, almost everyone left their costumes alone (except one boy who refused his tail and two others who took their ears off on stage and played with them instead of singing), and only one girl cried (and she kept singing through her tears- yes, she is a champion.) We sang the Itsy Bitsy Spider, the Wheels on the Bus, and Five Little Monkeys- all very successful. Especially Five Little Monkeys- I'm almost certain that the Greek Embassy across the street could hear their stomping on the stage. Some of the parents came up to me afterwards saying things like, "Ahhhh Miss Batreesa thank you so much! It is too much hard work you do for them" or "Ah it is lovely! Thank you Miss Batreesa!" or "God help you." That's right it's too much hard work. You should have seen me twenty minutes ago safety pinning tails and monkey stomachs on them and trying to keep them quiet in the back room of the stage.

But in the aftermath of the concert and the school year winding down, I'm returning to teaching life skills. Like tying your shoes. I obviously know children cannot tie their own shoes until they are taught but I just assumed that you teach your kid that before you send it to school to settle on an unsuspecting teacher. The only reason I discovered their serious lack of shoe-tying/velcroing skills is that the kids had to take their shoes off for our practices. Time to go back to class. Now, Choose Your Own KG1B Adventure:
1. Child lurks near my knees while holding its shoes and patting my upper thigh. Miss Batreesa Miss Batreesa Miss Batreesa Miss Batreesa Miss Batreesa
or
2. Child attempts to put on its own shoes. Because I am occupied by those who are making choice #1, I do not notice that 70% of them have put their shoes on the wrong feet until we return to class. How did they even walk that way?

I realized before I could teach them how to tie their shoes I had to show them which shoe goes on which foot. So yesterday after lunch consisted of me explaining a. the difference between left and right b. the difference between the inside and the outside of their foot and c. the difference between the inside and the outside of their shoe. Then I took their shoes away, threw them in a pile in the front of the room, had them get their shoes and put them back on. Minor chaos ensued and semi-successful outcome. Everyone got their shoes on the correct feet... eventually. We practiced again today. Maybe something we do until the last day.

And now for the final segment of my thoughts, tokens. Tokens of love and appreciation and personality insight from four year olds. To start this story off, for those of you who are wondering, yes it's summer again. With a vengeance. My glasses have started fogging up again when I go outside (the opposite of what used to happen in Boston). Today's high- 112. And today's special- P.E. Outdoor P.E. because KG1 doesn't rate gym time. Outdoor P.E. was all well and good when it was only 85 but now that the temps are consistently triple digits, I don't think it's safe to have four year olds running around in the desert. Plus they start to whine and I can't handle that. So today's P.E. consisted of me loosing the boys on the sole patch of grass on the grounds underneath a few struggling trees. Immediately I had three boys around me- "Teacher! For you!" "Miss Patreesa, for you!!" "Miss Batreesia, take!"

Any guesses as to what they were holding? Leaves. Tiny leaves scattered all over the grass. Then, all the boys wanted in. So every 2 seconds was punctuated by, "Miss Patreesa!!" and me receiving five new leaves. Until I had in my hands a pile of approximately 738 leaves.

"Miss Patreesa, take to your home!"
"Miss Patreesa, nice?"
"Miss Batreesia, from you!"
"Miss Patreesa, show to your mommy!"

Then some of them surpassed all bounds of sanity and starting breaking branches off the bushes and giving them to me..."Put for your hair Miss Patreesa!" "Miss Patreesa, put here! [points to my ear]" So of course, I did. Which immediately prompted, "Teacher, you crazy!" Thank you, Rayan. But he made up for it by running up to me shortly after, wrapping himself around my leg and saying, "Teacher, you beauty!"

I may have officially lost it. Putting tree branches in my hair? Where are they getting this vibe from? What do I do in class that gives them this idea about me? One of the other teachers did call me 'earthy' last week....

Point taken I suppose.